


We Both Know What We'll Choose

by rainforestgeek



Series: Why are you my remedy? [4]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Banter, Bonding, Brief Mention of Suicide, Canonical Character Death, Developing Relationship, F/M, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Healing, Light Angst, Pining, Post-Canon, Silly, it's not even that angsty, there's fluff i swear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-13
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:46:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24697033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainforestgeek/pseuds/rainforestgeek
Summary: The way to heal isn't always simple.Part 4 of "Why are you my remedy?"
Relationships: Hunk & Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt, Lance/Pidge | Katie Holt
Series: Why are you my remedy? [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1598608
Comments: 3
Kudos: 12





	We Both Know What We'll Choose

**Author's Note:**

> This has absolutely not been proofread so enjoy!!!

Pidge answered the incoming call and put her phone on speaker. “What’s up, Hunk?”

“Pidge! Oh it’s so good to hear your voice. How have you been?”

“Peachy.” That made Lance smile for some reason. She captured one of his pawns.

“That’s so good to hear. Just, ah, just got a question here – have you heard from Lance? None of us can reach him.”

Across the table, Lance’s whole body went tense. He glared at the chessboard in a way that made it very clear he wasn’t looking at the board so much as _not_ looking at the phone.

“Ummmm…yeah, I’ve heard from him. He sounded – fine.”

Pidge heard a massive sigh of relief from the other end of the line. “Okay, good. I needed confirmation he’s alive.”

Lance and Pidge locked eyes in confusion. “Uh, what do you mean? Are we getting threats?”

“Nothing like that. Not gonna lie, I was getting worried. He’s been completely silent lately and honestly, the last few times I _did_ see him he seemed kind of like he lost all his flavor. Like he’s barely being held up by his strings.”

With a heavy sigh, she retorted, “You’re not suggesting he’s going to – ”

“Maybe!”

Lance rolled his eyes so hard Pidge got mildly concerned they’d stick facing upward.

“Hunk. You’re catastrophizing. Lance is not going to off himself.”

“You have to look for the signs, Pidge.”

“Well, I’m the only who’s talked to him in a week so trust me when I say there’s nothing to worry about.”

“Promise?”

“I _promise_ , Hunk. Go bake your stress out.”

“Good idea, bye Pidge.”

“Bye.”

Pidge hung up at the same moment Lance knocked over her bishop. “Seriously? With a pawn?”

“Yeah, how did I do that?”

“By capturing the bishop with a single diagonal move,” she snarked. “Who’s winning?”

“Not sure. It’s your turn.”

Pidge looked critically at the board. She and Lance had begun seeking each other’s company after he found her crying on the roof and talking to a dead woman. In the spirit of silent solidarity they were learning to play chess together. For the challenge and the hell of it they were reinventing the wheel – they never looked up strategies or watched online lessons. They armed with no help but knowing the most basic rules of the game. Lance seemed to be picking it up more quickly than Pidge, judging by his win the last game instead of their usual stalemate.

She glanced up at him. “You’re not, right?”

“I’m not what?”

“Going to kill yourself.”

“Of course not, Pidge, what the hell. I’m grieving and angry at the world, that doesn’t mean I want to _die._ ”

“Good.” An uncomfortable lump formed in her throat. “But if you do have any thoughts like that, tell me.”

Lance’s eyes twinkled. Pidge’s mind was suspicious of the expression but her gut told her it was okay. How seriously was he taking this conversation? “If you promise to tell me if you get them, it’s a deal.”

“Deal.” After staring for a long time, a possible move suddenly popped out at her. Pidge moved her knight. “Check.”

He jolted upright in his seat. “Did I just lose?”

“No, that’s check _mate_ , your king’s in danger so you have to use this turn to get out of danger.”

Lance stared silently at the game for a solid minute. “I didn’t expect learning chess to involve so much imagining little L shapes.”

Pidge picked up her book and leaned back in her chair, balancing on the back two legs, and put her feet on the table. Her crossed ankles were right by Lance’s elbow. She wiggled her socked toes in his face. He swatted them off the table.

A silly thought occurred to her. “L for Lance.”

“Huh?”

Pidge tipped forward and slammed all four legs of her chair back onto the floor. “L shapes. L. Lance. Dude you’re a knight!”

A surprise laugh lit up his face. Pidge watched the happiness spread his lips and crinkle his eyes. It’d been a long time since she’d seen him be that carelessly joyful.

Lance flicked his eyes between the board and Pidge. “And you – ”

“Oh hell no, do not call me Pidge the pawn!”

“Of course not. Obviously, you’re the queen. Queen Katie. See?”

She fought (and lost) against the smile tugging at her lips. “I appreciate the alliterative connection, but Q and K are different letters.”

“Would you just accept your crown?” He held his hands out, leaning over the table, and coronated her with thin air.

She rested her head on her fist and giggled. “Dork.”

“Nerd.”

An hour later, they reached a stalemate and started a new game. If someone had told her four years ago that Pidge would be playing chess with Lance almost every day, she’d have asked what they were smoking.

The font door opened and clicked shut. Heavy footsteps traipsed through the living room and into the dining room, and Hunk found them sitting there, staring at him, with a board and two glasses of water on the table.

“What are you doing here Hunk?” Pidge demanded. “I know my dad gave you a key but you could have texted me with a heads-up before just marching into my house.”

“I wanted to surprise you with these cookies. They’re your favorite, peanut butter.” Hunk eyed them both. Concern and hurt were evident on his face. It almost made Pidge feel guilty. He put the tupperwear down. “So this is what you meant? Lance, have you been hiding out here this whole time?”

Lance moodily moved his bishop. Hunk sat down.

“Come on, man. Why’d you fall off the grid? Why are you ignoring me?”

Lance pouted at him. “I’d be happy to hang out with you, Hunk, if you didn’t keep trying to force me to talk about Allura. The last thing I want to do is relive our relationship while I’m still coming to terms with her death.”

There was a funny way Lance had said, “relive our relationship.”

“Oh sure, because lying to your friends and running away from your heartbreak is healthy. You loved her, you have to grieve her.”

“Get off your high horse, Hunk. We never would’ve gotten together if you and Romelle didn’t pressure us!”

“How did I pressure you?”

“Do you really not remember kicking me toward her?”

“I was tired of your pathetic moping and pining.”

“Well, _maybe_ I was about ready to move on!”

Pidge snapped her head up. Lance looked startled at his admission, too.

“Lance…” she said carefully, “did you _want_ to be Allura’s boyfriend?”

Lance’s mouth opened and closed silently. His eyes had gone unfocused.

Hunk cast his eyes, shame-faced, to the ground. “I thought I was helping you.”

“Well, you weren’t.”

“I really am sorry, man. It just seemed like you were feeling insecure, you know? The jealousy, the pining. I thought you just needed a courage boost.”

Pidge unexpectedly felt anger rise in her chest. Her heartbeat made itself known against her ribs.

“Hunk, I feel like scum sometimes. Allura was lonely. She’d lost _everything,_ and there I was, swooping in on a vulnerable girl like a tool. I’ve been thinking about it, and I don’t think we would’ve gotten together if she was in a good place. She said she loved me, but she never told me why.”

“It wasn’t fair to either of you,” Pidge said.

Lance gestured at her, looking at Hunk. “See? Pidge gets it.”

“Lance – ”

“I’m done talking about this, Hunk. So if you’re gonna stay…” he let the sentence dangle.

Looking a little sad, Hunk pushed the cookies toward the center of the table. “I’m sorry if I haven’t been a good friend. But call me if you need anything, okay? I mean, you don’t _have_ to call _me_ but you can.”

Pidge was examining the wood grain of the table, so she didn’t know if he was talking to both of them or not. She listened to him walk to then out the front door. Then she refocused on the game.

It had been years since Hunk got on her nerves this much. It was unavoidable when they were Garrison cadets. On the Castle they’d gotten over that and he became her best friend.

Ever since Allura died, Pidge and Hunk had drifted apart. Without being forced to live in close quarters it was easy to get away from him and the last thing she’d wanted in her grief was company. Until Lance had clambered onto the roof with her to suffer in mutual silence. He’d wanted the team’s consoling presence even less than she did. Misery loves company; but it has to be very specific company.

Maybe it wasn’t a good thing she and Lance were isolating themselves from the rest of the team. Keith, Shiro, and Hunk meant well and she loved them.

Pidge downed the rest of her water – an impressive feat, since it was still half full – then stood to go to the kitchen. She refilled the glass at the sink, staring through the window, and taking a sip.

She heard Lance’s chair scrape against the tiled floor. “Pidge? You okay?”

“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be fine? Just Hunk showing up unannounced and dredging up shit."

“Is this about Allura?”

“Yes. No!”

“Is it about Hunk?”

“Just – he – ” her breath arrested in her throat. Thoughts spun around until a handful settled into something like a sentence. “Does he even really know us? ‘Hey Lance, you’re a flirt, you obviously need a traumatized girlfriend!’ ‘Pidge – why, why don’t you go play with your robot parts, because you’ll never need my help with anything romantic at all because you might as well be a robot too!’” Pidge realized her voice had gotten louder and louder, once she heard the silence following that final yell. She panted with her back to her friend and stared at the wall. She waited for her heart rate to calm.

That’s – what. Pidge didn’t even know she was feeling all that. But.

If Lance’s crush was so obvious to Hunk, why wasn’t hers? It’s not that she wanted Hunk to have pushed her at Lance, but it would’ve been nice if he’d thought she was worth pushing.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when Lance hugged her from behind, one arm across her shoulders and one around her waist. “Hunk’s an idiot,” he murmured in her ear.

Pidge shivered. His breath was brushing her neck. “Objectively, he isn’t.”

“When it comes to love he is,” Lance insisted. “If he can’t see that you’re attractive and desirable then he’s stupid. Period. End of discussion.” He hesitated, then kissed her cheek. Every one of her skin cells began to dance the macarena.

Pidge wriggled out of his hold. “Let’s play. I’m going to trounce you this time.”


End file.
